I Thought I'm Great

Q : Do I speak good English?

A : Yes I do think so.

Q : Do I laugh when someone misspell words in English?

A : It’s a must!

Q : Is there someone thinking that I don’t have good English?

A : Only if they’re deft and illiterate

Q : Biggest compliment I’ve ever had for my English

A : Have you’ve been living abroad? You sound like someone who’s been abroad.

Q : Have I written something in English?

A : Just this blog

Q : Have I read books in English?

A : Took me decades to just finish one chapter.

Q : Will I always speak English fluently in front of people?

A : Those English words are suddenly find its way out and left my brain empty.

So I do love English and other languages, everybody knows that –at least almost everybody– I always thought my English is superb. Until last month. I shifted to a totally brand new chapter in my life. Met totally brand new faces and stories. Spends almost every weekend with a family who’s one step ahead in knowledge. They read good books in English. They absorb any information which is happening in any part of this world. And they love to discuss about it during meals, and sometimes in English. And me? Just happen to be in the middle of the meals but unfortunately not in the middle of the discussion. Thank God I’m still armed by a way out which is ‘nod your head even when you found them speaking Mars’.

This is madness!!!

Have you caught yourself in the middle of a situation where you think you are the MAN but you’re not? It sucks isn’t it? Worse than when you have to wear a very uncomfortable fabric for your underwear.

Not to mention that COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO –you’ll soon find out why I type this in capital– one of my co-workers ask me to do a favor for him to check out some of his English pre-test or so called pre-test. And I spent 2 damn weeks to only finish 60 questions about grammar and friends –now you know why I typed it in capital– that was even longer than when my cousin's planning her wedding. I even found difficulties on how to use a simple past tense. How jerk was that?

Really…really…really…and I mean really need help for this. Surely this blog is one of the help I have. Reading words in English loudly also helps. Swearing in English doesn’t help that much but it’s purifying your soul -so what the heck?!?-. Have a conversation with myself in English always been the greatest help I have at every moment.

Let’s deliver some prayer so I’m still able to say the difference between the words ‘three’ and ‘tree’ in two months from now. As the wise man said “An idle brain is the devil's workshop” – no, that proverb has nothing to do with the story, I just love it.

Anyway, just always think that there will always someone who’s better than you are then it will keep you humble, so now I know even though I always thought I’m great, but the fact is I’m not.

I’m just good.

Maria