People come and go. Some stay but
most of them go. All of them put a step in your life for a specific kind of
reason. Some to hurt you, but most to cheer you up. Some to leave scars, but
most to carve warmth in your heart. But definitely all of them came to create memories.
Whether it contains tears or smile.
It's amazing what a year could
bring. A lover is not a lover anymore. Even an enemy is not a so enemy anymore.
And you. Don't seem yourself anymore. Suddenly you are transformed into
something else. Doing things you used to hate. Leaving things you used to love.
Neglect people who care about you. And paying too much attention into people
who won’t even jump a puddle for you.
After all that's what we all call
life or should I say my life. You really can't predict what will happen
tomorrow. What conversation you will have. No matter how much you practice it
the day before. It will end up totally different.
And friends…or so called friends
are something you really need to dig deeper than you should. They. Are the
people they think they know who you are. But guess what? They don’t. Just put
that doctrine inside your head. That when someone who called them self your
friend call you stingy for yourself, you don’t have to sweat onto it. You know
they’re just wrong. They don’t know who you are. They don’t pay your bills. So don’t
waste your time, and also don’t waste a spot in your brain and heart to even
think about it. Just because you do your own laundry instead of taking it to
the nearest launderette doesn’t mean that you’re stingy. Got it???
You need to be humble. You don’t
have to specify your daily expenses to them. You don’t have to tell the world
you pay IDR 900K just for a shoe. Or IDR 300K just for a pajamas –though they
will know now after you wrote this– But you just don’t have to spill it into
their face. They will never understand. And WILL still find another reasons to
tell that you’re still cheap. Beside that it doesn’t do any good to you.
Once I read a quote ‘If you
expect the world to be fair with you because you’re fair, you’re fooling
yourself. That’s like expecting the lion not to eat you just because you didn’t
eat him’ and I say amen to that quote. Though it is damn hard to live it.
I am a kind of person who let
what is inside my head out. I think after I speak. I have a small amount of friends.
And I am ok with it. I just don’t like when people are pretending to be fond of
something when they are not. I don’t like people who will do anything for other’s
sake while they’re own life are at stake. That’s why I don’t like people who
pretend that they like me when the fact is they just can’t stand of me. So I am
completely ok with my very tiny small circle of friends. But these people are
the ones who take me as who I am. Who are able to spit bad words at me when I do
bad things. Who will drag me to crawl back in track when life gets rough and I decide
to give up. The ones that I love so much.
I guess I wasn’t there when God share a good
heart to human being He’s about to create. But I swear I bust my ass to keep up
with the people who have those in their gen. I help people who look like they need
a help. I yell at people a lot also. Sooo…I guess I am not a good hearted
person. But trust me. I am trying.
-m-
